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How to Cruise for Gay and Bisexual Men: Etiquette, Safety, and Hot Gay Sex

Your first time cruising for sex can be intimidating and confusing if you’re not adequately prepared. There are many subtleties to finding a hot hookup, from reading body language to picking the best times and places. Below is a guide to some of the steadfast rules of meeting hot guys in any cruising location.

No Means No: If He Isn’t Interested, Move On

Cruising must be consensual. There are no exceptions to this rule. If a guy says he isn’t interested, he is “just resting”, or he is “taking a break”, that is a clear indicator that he isn’t down to hook up. Don’t take it personally; everyone is interested in different types of guys. Sometimes men will also give non-verbal cues that you two aren’t a match. This includes signs such as avoiding eye contact, avoiding jerking off, and facing away from you. Don’t stress about it, simply move on and find another guy who seems more attentive.

Communicate Clearly For a More Satisfying Sexual Encounter

Just because the sex you’re having is anonymous doesn’t mean that communication with your partner needs to break down. Once you get into it with a hot guy you can’t just grab him and do whatever you want. You need to find out what he is open to, and he will reciprocate if he wants the same kind of sex. Some guys just want to give head, some just want head, and some expect an even give-take relationship. The same kind of variation applies to anal sex, rim jobs, hand jobs, and anything else you’re in the mood for. Keep in mind, however, that cruising isn’t a time for long winded conversation – ask direct questions and keep the talking to a minimum. This applies to bathhouses, gyms, and porn theatres too.

How to Cruise Safely: Be Aware of Your Surroundings and Your State of Mind

Cruising requires you to make certain important judgment calls, especially about who you have sex with and how safe that sex is. That in mind, it’s best not to go out cruising when you’re depressed or upset, since this can affect decision making. Similarly, drugs and alcohol can impair your choices, so know your limits if you’re cruising while under the influence. Finally, always bring condoms and lube with you so you’re prepared to have safe encounters. When you’re finished, make sure you bring any condoms or lube you used (including the wrappers), with you when you leave to dispose of them. Leaving condoms and lube around can draw attention to the spot and lead to surveillance of the area.

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